Dear Kohen,

Somewhere in the midst of you learning to hold your headup , crawling, and now walking, you grew into my smiley, little one-year-old.

I can hardly swallow the words as they roll off of my tongue, “one-year-old,” where did this year go?

Weren’t we just telling everyone the news that you were going to be joining our family?   Weren’t we just driving to the hospital on that unseasonably warm November day? Weren’t we just sitting in triage, terrified, as we heard the woman feet away from us giving birth to her precious little one through the paper thin curtain? And didn’t you just join this world, as your Dad smiled at me and said, “it’s a baby boy!”

And now suddenly you are a sweet, little one year old…dare I say it?  Boy. Yesterday, as I was getting ready for your party, I saw glimpses of silver mixed in with my dark hair. A sign that not only you’re getting older, but I am as well. I know this could make me sad under normal circumstances, but it made me smile big! I am so happy with my life, and so happy to be getting older, because with age has come the greatest gifts of all. You and Koeplin!

I love to watch you grow and change everyday. Love seeing you discover and learn new things. You have such a gentle, kind soul. There are times that we get glimpses of who you are and what you will be, sometimes when you smile at me I see a flash of you when you are grown.  I may be partial, but I think you are going to grow up to be a wonderful man. You are shy at first, but once you warm up to others you are a little lover. You love snuggling, singing, and climbing…oh my, do you ever like to climb. The stairs, our wine rack, anything you can find to climb up you do…you are our little monkey!  You prefer your brothers toys over your own, and most days your brother is happy to share with you. I love seeing the bond you and your brother have grow. I know there will be huge, blowout fights between the two of you. I know there will be times that you think you hate one another. But I hope all of that is overshadowed by the wonderful times you have growing up together, being little boys; digging in the dirt, building forts and playing with trucks. I hope that you are one anothers best friend! I’m sure there will be days all the testosterone in our house will get to me, but it makes me smile when I imagine you guys throwing the football around with your Dad, or all watching the game together. And we are going to take some great adventures when you and your brother get a little older. We have so much to look forward to!

Your Dad, Koeplin and I were already happy before we had you, but somehow you have brought even more happiness to our family this past year. We are so lucky to have you. I hope we can make you as happy as you have made us. Today we celebrate the birth of you dear little Kohen. I wish I could keep you little forever, so please don’t grow up too fast!

Happy first Birthday baby, boy.

Love, Momma